Top Ten Reasons Santa does not use the computer:
- Each time he went out he would have to re-boot or the sleigh might crash
- The presents may fall out of the net
- He wouldn’t use chimneys but You Tubes
- Toys would get mixed up – he only knows email addresses and is not sure whether a child is a girl or boy – he only knows them by their nicknames.
- His sleigh would be made out of Chrome and Rudolph would be a RAM
- The reindeer may get lost as if they don’t know the correct router and they would have to detour via Farmville, CityVille, Frontierville ….
- He would be on Facebook and really would know if you had been naughty or nice.
- Santa’s computer knowledge was elf-taught
- lol lol lol does not have the same ring to it as ho ho ho
- Sorry folks – Christmas only runs on Windows 7
Santa in Chat
Santa: ASL?
Girl: 10/F/Au
Santa: WDUWTA?
Girl: what are you bringing me for xmas IYDMMA
Santa: nufn, IIRC you have been 0tyGirl: OMG Y
Santa: OJ ROFL
Santa: BRB reindeers to feed
Girl: k
Santa: back
Santa: no really I am bringing you an Intel Core 2 Quad Q8400, 2.66GHz CPU
Girl: W00t kewl
Santa: YW TTFN ETA 3.30am
Girl: TIA CU L8R
Santa: cya but you wont c me
| 0ty ………….. | Naughty |
| ASL ……….. | Age Sex Location |
| IIRC ……….. | If I remember correctly |
| Nufn ……….. | Nothing |
| OJ ………….. | Only Joking |
| OMG ………. | Oh my Goodness |
| TIA …………. | Thanks in Advance |
| TTFN ……… | Ta Ta for now |
| WDUWTA .. | What do you want to talk about |
| IYDMMA .. | If you don’t mind me asking |
| YW ………… | You’re welcome |